Business deals get muddied with amateur mistakes or lack of follow up. Personal relationships become ugly and complicated. Your life looks harder to repair than to walk away from.
We're human. We have the amazing ability to create ... and destroy ... ourselves.
~ authentic Carol Carterism #13 (how appropriate!)
I live in a townhouse complex that has all vehicles parked in the center of the rows of buildings. Communal living makes for some interesting stories!
Many months ago, a neighbour (we'll call him Mr. Angry) comes home to find a very nice, convertible sports car parked in his parking stall. There's much yelling and some banging of doors. He has my attention, as well as anyone else who is in their kitchen, overlooking the echoing parking area.
His wife urgently tries to calm Mr. Angry down. This couple just moved into our complex a few months earlier. Wife's efforts are lame at best. I figure she's embarrassed by this over the top reaction, but now I know Wife wasn't completely sure that Mr. Angry wouldn't turn all that rage on her. Mr. Angry disappears into his house.
Peace. I breathe. Wife is frozen, uncertain. Weird ... until Mr. Angry reappears ... with a shovel! He starts chopping into the ragtop of the little sportscar! At this point I'm calling back to my 6'4", 260 lb love of my life, Mr. Incredible, to come to the window. We might need him!
Mr. Angry reaches through the gaping new hole in the ragtop of the convertable, unlocks the door, reaches into the car and starts pulling out everything inside it! Bags, clothes, makeup, paper is flung into the parking lot! Mr. Angry jumps into the driver's seat, pulls the vehicle into gear, steps out and starts pushing the offending car backwards using the driver's door frame.
Note to self: purchase club for steering wheel.
A frantic young lady bursts from the doorway of the unit next to Mr. Angry's, yelling "What are you doing? STOP! That's my stuff! I'll move my car! I'll move my car!". Miss Frantic tries to gather her strewn personal items, which spill right back out of her arms as she stoops to pick up more. By this time a crowd of concerned neighbours have gathered at the edges of the parking lot, keeping a safe distance, talking amongst themselves in hushed and excited tones. I watch (with Mr. Incredible) from the safety of my kitchen.
Mr. Angry lets go of Miss Frantic's sad, violated sportscar and hops into the drivers seat of his VW Golf ten yards away. As Miss Frantic pulls out of Mr. Angry's parking stall, Mr. Angry takes a run at her, slamming his brakes inches from the side of her car!! A collective "Ooh!" escapes from the gathering crowd! Miss Frantic pulls back into Mr. Angry's parking stall. Mr. Angry retreats into his corner again ... both wait ... for the next move.
Quickly, Miss Frantic takes a run for it, backwards, through the entire parking lot. Her reverse gear screams for mercy. Mr. Angry speeds into his stall, steps out of his car, slams his door, goes out of his way to run and kick one of Miss Frantic's bags, and disappears for good into his unit.
Wow! Can Mr. Angry ever recover from this?
I'd love to be a fly on the wall at ICBC. "You did WHAT with the shovel???" Even if his wife is the sweetest being on the planet, I will never have coffee at their house ... and I never want to be mentioned in one of their personal conversations, or know what goes on behind their closed doors when Mr. Angry is ... angry. In fact, I want to move.
The police came. Mr. Angry was arrested. I was called in to give a statement because I'm one of the few who dared to admit I saw the whole thing. My first question? "Will this statement be anonymous?" Months later I was contacted by the RCMP ... to appear in court in November. Now it's November. Anxiety! Will Mr. Angry retaliate against the neighbours who testify? This morning, Constable Linda helped me breathe again. There's a warrant out for Mr. Angry who failed to appear in court. I'm off the hook ... for now ...
I asked earlier - can Mr. Angry ever recover from this? In short "YES!!!!" Will it be easy? NO!!!! Will he do it? ... That's up to him and his ego.
No matter how ugly life looks, how deep you sink, how judged you are, there's always, ALWAYS a way to set things right and be truly alive again. ~ authentic Carol Carterism #14
Have you backed yourself into life's darker corners - late with your taxes? Overdue bills? Damaged relationships? Ruined credibility at work?
It's tempting to try to edge along the wall and hope no one sees you slip away (like Mr. Angry and his latest "failure to appear"). The next survival instinct when you can't just disappear, is to come out with your claws slashing, attacking everyone in your path (that's a whole other Mr. Angry story). You will never truly be free. As hard as it is, the only way to freedom is straight forward. You must accept responsibility, open your hands, your eyes, your ears and your mind and ask:
"How can I fix this?", "Can you help me?" ... and "I'm so sorry."
The world is a nutty place full of opportunities for epic failure, unimaginable recovery and THEN spectacular success!
~ authentic Carol Carterism #15.
Will Mr. Angry recover from the mounting list of legal black marks?
Part of me hopes he never does, but is arrested for one of the many other MORE horrible things he's been up to, and is locked up for years. However, the part of me that has messed up relationships, finances and credibility in the past, knows that it would be better for EVERYONE if Mr. Angry opened his heart and mind, accepted responsibility and asked "How do I fix this?".
Maybe then, his wife can have coffee with a neighbour.
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