Getting Out of Trouble ... For Real

Have you ever messed up in life so badly you felt you would never recover?

Business deals get muddied with amateur mistakes or lack of follow up. Personal relationships become ugly and complicated. Your life looks harder to repair than to walk away from.

We're human. We have the amazing ability to create ... and destroy ... ourselves.

 ~ authentic Carol Carterism #13 (how appropriate!)

I live in a townhouse complex that has all vehicles parked in the center of the rows of buildings. Communal living makes for some interesting stories!

Many months ago, a neighbour (we'll call him Mr. Angry) comes home to find a very nice, convertible sports car parked in his parking stall. There's much yelling and some banging of doors. He has my attention, as well as anyone else who is in their kitchen, overlooking the echoing parking area.

His wife urgently tries to calm Mr. Angry down. This couple just moved into our complex a few months earlier. Wife's efforts are lame at best. I figure she's embarrassed by this over the top reaction, but now I know Wife wasn't completely sure that Mr. Angry wouldn't turn all that rage on her. Mr. Angry disappears into his house.

Peace. I breathe. Wife is frozen, uncertain. Weird ... until Mr. Angry reappears ... with a shovel! He starts chopping into the ragtop of the little sportscar! At this point I'm calling back to my 6'4", 260 lb love of my life, Mr. Incredible, to come to the window. We might need him!

Mr. Angry reaches through the gaping new hole in the ragtop of the convertable, unlocks the door, reaches into the car and starts pulling out everything inside it! Bags, clothes, makeup, paper is flung into the parking lot! Mr. Angry jumps into the driver's seat, pulls the vehicle into gear, steps out and starts pushing the offending car backwards using the driver's door frame.

Note to self: purchase club for steering wheel. 

A frantic young lady bursts from the doorway of the unit next to Mr. Angry's, yelling "What are you doing? STOP! That's my stuff! I'll move my car! I'll move my car!". Miss Frantic tries to gather her strewn personal items, which spill right back out of her arms as she stoops to pick up more. By this time a crowd of concerned neighbours have gathered at the edges of the parking lot, keeping a safe distance, talking amongst themselves in hushed and excited tones. I watch (with Mr. Incredible) from the safety of my kitchen.

Mr. Angry lets go of Miss Frantic's sad, violated sportscar and hops into the drivers seat of his VW Golf ten yards away.  As Miss Frantic pulls out of Mr. Angry's parking stall, Mr. Angry takes a run at her, slamming his brakes inches from the side of her car!! A collective "Ooh!" escapes from the gathering crowd! Miss Frantic pulls back into Mr. Angry's parking stall. Mr. Angry retreats into his corner again ... both wait ... for the next move.

Quickly, Miss Frantic takes a run for it, backwards, through the entire parking lot. Her reverse gear screams for mercy. Mr. Angry speeds into his stall, steps out of his car, slams his door, goes out of his way to run and kick one of Miss Frantic's bags, and disappears for good into his unit.

Wow! Can Mr. Angry ever recover from this? 

I'd love to be a fly on the wall at ICBC. "You did WHAT with the shovel???" Even if his wife is the sweetest being on the planet, I will never have coffee at their house ... and I never want to be mentioned in one of their personal conversations, or know what goes on behind their closed doors when Mr. Angry is ... angry. In fact, I want to move.

The police came. Mr. Angry was arrested. I was called in to give a statement because I'm one of the few who dared to admit I saw the whole thing. My first question? "Will this statement be anonymous?" Months later I was contacted by the RCMP ... to appear in court in November. Now it's November. Anxiety! Will Mr. Angry retaliate against the neighbours who testify? This morning, Constable Linda helped me breathe again. There's a warrant out for Mr. Angry who failed to appear in court. I'm off the hook ... for now ...

I asked earlier - can Mr. Angry ever recover from this? In short "YES!!!!" Will it be easy? NO!!!! Will he do it? ... That's up to him and his ego.

No matter how ugly life looks, how deep you sink, how judged you are, there's always, ALWAYS a way to set things right and be truly alive again. ~ authentic Carol Carterism #14

Have you backed yourself into life's darker corners - late with your taxes? Overdue bills? Damaged relationships? Ruined credibility at work?

It's tempting to try to edge along the wall and hope no one sees you slip away (like Mr. Angry and his latest "failure to appear"). The next survival instinct when you can't just disappear, is to come out with your claws slashing, attacking everyone in your path (that's a whole other Mr. Angry story). You will never truly be free. As hard as it is, the only way to freedom is straight forward. You must accept responsibility, open your hands, your eyes, your ears and your mind and ask:

"How can I fix this?", "Can you help me?" ... and "I'm so sorry."

The world is a nutty place full of opportunities for epic failure, unimaginable recovery and THEN spectacular success!

~ authentic Carol Carterism #15. 

Will Mr. Angry recover from the mounting list of legal black marks?

Part of me hopes he never does, but is arrested for one of the many other MORE horrible things he's been up to, and is locked up for years. However, the part of me that has messed up relationships, finances and credibility in the past, knows that it would be better for EVERYONE if Mr. Angry opened his heart and mind, accepted responsibility and asked "How do I fix this?".

Maybe then, his wife can have coffee with a neighbour.

Being Derailed in Your New Business

“No plan survives contact with the enemy.” ~ Field Marshal Helmuth Graf von Moltke

Whenever you create a business plan, you always have contingency options - different paths to the same ends should something not go as planned. You think you have the bases covered, you are all set for success in 3 or 4 different options ...

No one ever expects that they will be in an accident.

I was lucky to only have whiplash. Of course, now I have the lovely task of attempting to quantify my losses ... when I'm just starting out. Thank God for my business plan! Do NOT start a business without one. I can prove why I was not able to follow my business plan as expected. It's up to the lawyers to then fight it out.

Too often, thinking ourselves quite brilliant, we skip the step of making careful step-by-step, month-by-month projections. After all, it's likely to change, hopefully for the better. In my case, my projections were conservative. I kinda wish I had been more optimistic ...

• Have you looked at your business plan lately?
• Do you have a plan B, C, D and E just in case?
• What if you are in an accident? Do you have a contingency plan for that scenario?

The nature of accidents is they never should have happened. They cause irreparable damage. You never know what could have been had they not happened at all. Guard yourself. Plan for the worst, expect the best and don't let unexpected obstacles derail you ... at least ... not for very long.

The awkwardness of NEW

There is something energizing, inspiring ... and downright clumsy about starting a new venture. Nothing is solid. Everything is shifting.Ideas and opportunities are everywhere. It's so easy to doubt yourself, become distracted from your purpose and start pedaling backwards.

During my turn to share my wins, failures and asks, I explained to my Success Buddies group that I have been busy procrastinating. I am SOOOO busy I do not have time to do what I really need to do - get in front of decision makers of the companies who need my help.

There's plenty of busy work to be done - website, social media updates, networking events, planning marketing campaigns, arranging signage, creating more product, researching ... yes, those will pay off in the future, but to be sustainable, I need to focus on what is closest to the almighty dollar. I need to generate sales!

I see why most small business start-ups fail. It's easy to get caught in a rut of busy-ness and lose sight of the important priorities ... which will turn into urgent ones the longer we avoid them.

I know this stuff. I teach leaders of companies how to manage their subordinates around this stuff (see my latest GetThrival blog on all the steps of goal setting). Somehow helping myself around this stuff is much harder than helping others. But that's true with most things.

• It's easier to promote others than it is to promote yourself.
• It's easier to see what others need to change, stop or do than it is to see your own needs.
• It's easier to help someone else plan a path to success than it is to plan your own path.

Starting a business is always tricky to budget. We cut funding for things that would take us further faster, like hiring help. We hide the fact that we're a struggling start-up from other business people because we fear they will judge us, not buy from us and not recommend us to others.

Here's what I believe. If you are authentic, if you have a clear purpose and have passion for that purpose, if you have focused on and really know something others don't have time to study and if you are ready and willing to share that knowledge with others to help make their business or personal life better, being a start-up does not matter. People will promote you. They will want to see you succeed. They will capture your passion and vision and want to pass you on to the connections who can help you the most.

Fellow entrepreneurs, when you find yourself buried in busy-work to avoid getting out there and making sales:

1. Ask yourself what you are afraid of. 
2. Ask yourself what is the worst thing that could happen if you go out and talk to the people who will decide to purchase from you. 
3. Know the worst. Prepare yourself on how to handle it. 
4. Think of the BEST things that could happen. Brainstorm on all the possibilities. 
5. Prepare yourself  on how to handle these great things.

Do these 5 steps. Do them every time you catch yourself doing less of what is going to fill your bank account and more of what is simply "busy" work. Contact fellow entrepreneurs and do these steps together for each others' businesses. Do whatever it takes to get back on a solid path to success!

ARGH! Overload!

I had a vision (not sure why) that, on top of the joy of finally doing what I'm best at, THIS type of business was going to be easy to manage. No customers freaking out, asking me to deliver on an impossible deadline when I had to rely on supply chains from back east and overseas, or screen printers and embroiderers out here. I provide the product - training, workshops, speaking - therefore I control the chaos.

Years ago, there was no big push for "Social Media". Wow! Is that ever time consuming. I know in my business I need to have it to build the know/like/trust factor with potential clients, but seriously!

I've focused on three areas - Facebook (which has had the most response), Twitter (not sure I'm using it right) and LinkedIn (getting NOOOOO response whatsoever). Well, it's there. Permanently. Which is good if someone ever looks me up and goes back through my historical postings. (you can let me know how I'm doing at http://www.facebook.com/getthrival . Please click on the "Like" button at the top of the page!). 

All this is free ... other than the cost of precious time and sleep. I have not done "audience building" though ... which is where the $$$ comes in. How far down that road do I go? Seriously, I'm getting very few clicks to my daily leadership skill and challenge I'm posting each weekday. Some of them are coming from France, UK, Japan, Russia ...?? HOW did someone from Russia find me? And France?

Reality is, I just want to do what I do best - deliver training to teams and leaders who desperately need and want it. All this social media is a distraction, but seems to be a necessary evil. Meanwhile, I've all but abandoned my REAL website, finally getting frustrated enough with the Joomla editor that I refuse to do one more post in it. Must tackle that next week ... oh to have the $$$ to just hand it over to someone else.

Just goes to prove that NOTHING in this world is free. If it doesn't cost you money, it probably costs you time, sanity and opportunity. Spending the money on something more direct to my audience may be cheaper than this "free" cyberspace advertising!

I'd LOVE your comments and suggestions! Please, please, please!

Day #14: Luck is Where Preparation Meets Opportunity

When starting anything BIG, it's hard to see the end product. So many "What if's" and issues stand in between. It's also hard to believe you can create something much, MUCH larger than yourself. Many people just give up before they start. The amount of effort and risk is too great for them.

Those are the people I often hear call successful entrepreneurs "Lucky" with a slight sneer in their voices.

Let's back the truck up a bit.

I knew a millionaire who made all his profits on building and running hotels. He was approached to help create a set of hotels for a future ski destination (Whistler Village) back when Whistler was a tiny lift at Creekside. He said

"That would be a bad investment. Who is going to drive two hours down a windy mountain road to go skiing when we have ski hills just a half hour from downtown Vancouver?"

I knew a man who, on a plane ride, sat beside a very enthusiastic young entrepreneur who wanted to create a chain of "fast food" counters. Not only that, he was looking for other entrepreneurs to get in on the ground floor of his "turn-key" type of operation. The man I knew said

"Who wants food that's made fast to take on the run? People want a good quality home-cooked-like meal that they can enjoy over great conversation in a great atmosphere."  

The entrepreneur gave him his info just in case he changed his mind. The entrepreneur's name? Ray Kroc.

Now, you could call the founder of the McDonalds' fast food chain or the visionary Franz Wilhelmzen who assembled  a group of Vancouver businessmen to create Whistler "Lucky", and to some extent you may be right. McDonalds' could have bombed but Ray observed its original store thriving and built a plan to bring it to the world. Whistler might not have got off the ground, but Franz knew mountains and had a strong desire to hold the Olympic Games there. I believe that these successes have much more to do with visionary persistence and active preparation than any sort of luck.

So ... my Big Hairy Audacious Goals are far larger than me, but I know they can be done ... by hitting the right Opportunity after the right Preparation. Every step will take courage, vision and work. I'm ready to create my own luck! 

Day #8: I Had An AWESOME Banking Experience Today!

That's a sentence you don't hear too often! I don't think I've ever uttered that sentence in my entire financial life. I truly had a great time at the bank today!

I was agonizing over where to open my business account. The BIG bank (shall remain unnamed ... I hear most of them are the same anyway) where all my personal banking lives, has been frustrating. In fact, I think I'm paying WAY too much in fees to them each month, to stand in a long line and receive minimal service. Until today, I viewed banking as a necessary evil. When I hear their income reported on my daily news radio channel, it just makes me ... very angry. Banks ... can't stand 'em, can't live without 'em.

the Arrogant Worms song:  "Proud to be a Banker"

I did my research and settled on (this I will name because they are AWESOME) Coast Capital Savings. I parked in their parking lot. No one tried to run me over or jam my door. Good start. I walked in and saw ... NO LINE UP! Tellers were pleasantly chatting and doing paperwork. They smiled at me as I walked up to the business teller. I did not have an appointment. The small business account manager was busy with a client but she set me up with one of the other account managers right away, while I wandered toward the coffee in the middle of the room.

Now, coffee sitting in the middle of any office after about 1pm is iffy at best. I placed my cup under the spout and gave the carafe a quick push to test. It was HOT! it smelled RIGHT! Yay!

Before I finished my cup I was in an account manager's office where she quickly checked my credit and told me what I was eligible for. she set up my account with:

• NO monthly fees
• NO deposit fees
• NO transfer fees
• FREE online banking
• A small fee for each withdrawal which will cost less than I'm paying right now for my regular account at the BIG bank.
• FREE non-personalized cheques AND
• A line of credit directly connected to the account so I don't need to juggle and check balances all the time ... NO TRANSFER FEES!

I should have switched YEARS ago! I cringe at all the money I've forked out to (unnamed BIG bank). being one who likes to do her research, once I have verified all the "ins and outs", I am likely moving ALL my business over to this company!

KUDOS, Coast Capital! You not only made my day, you changed the way I feel about banking!

Day #6: The Best Laid Plans ...

The curse of starting your own business is ... it's just YOU. You are:

• planner/visionary
• designer
• technician
• sales team
• marketing team
• administrator
• executive assistant
• accountant
• janitor

As carefully as you plan in months leading up to launch date, as realistic as your projections are and as much as you coach yourself not to do this, the first week of business seems to be full of paperwork, organization, scrambling to take care of legalities and ... BUSY STUFF - the STUFF that keeps you occupied but does nothing tangible for your bottom line.

Paperwork is a necessary evil and always seems to take WAY longer than anticipated.

Natural reaction? FRUSTRATION! Feel the cortisol and adrenaline rise. Feel the brain power disappear. I don't think humans were designed to sit all day typing on a computer, shuffling paperwork and answering electronic devices. By 1PM today I wanted to run, swim, kayak, hike, bike ... ANYTHING but what I was doing.

Antidote? ... What used to work well for me was an early start to my day (6AM), biting off some dreaded paperwork monster over a giant glass of water, going for a quick run while I organized the rest of my day's plan in my brain, checking and answering email after a good stretch, hitting the shower and being
ready to call and see clients by 9AM.

An early morning routine that eats cortisol can really boost productivity. Just make sure you are ready to take care of business when your potential clients are because, if you get locked in paperwork during regular business hours, it can really munch on your day!